Triggers

Good lord the last few weeks have been hard ,hence not posting much just trying to keep afloat ,work stress,money stress,friend stress TOO much stress and slowly progressing to not going to therapy as im doing well....its been a week of SHE SAID WHAT!!and Oh fuck i,m going to cry (imagine a gunman next to you every time you think you are going to cry and you get an inkling of what that feels like for me ) having learnt this week that just because i,m am polite say things in the right tone in the right manner it doesn't fucking matter, people still get their tits in a tango and sulk and carry on like big babies it pisses me off when I really make an effort to practice my DBT(look it up ) skills and people don't co operate!!aghhhh anyway I am still persisting with my skills even though I have to use about 5 skills to practice the one i really want to use . ..my urge is to not talk (isolate )to ignore (sulk)to cut people  off ..(sabotage)not keep in contact assume the worst and yell and blame   woohoo....worst of all this week is I know I have been triggered not just once but multiple times... it all gets too much when this happened I was so drained yesterday I really wondered what my life was about being constantly triggered sucks ..they never stop I think I know them then BAM in comes a new memory or an old one that I think im okay with comes back, I am heartily sick of being triggered this week I am going to spend time alone but not because I don't like people its because I like them and I don't want to be angry at them because of something that happened years ago they are just sadly pushing a bomb trigger :(...any way that's my bit of a rant so what am i doing to help lower my stress ...

well actually i stood up for myself and did it with good firm polite manners so suck it!..and i also am making sure i eat well...sleeping ok i have slowly weaned myself down to 4 coffees a day miracle there!spending some time in the garden...being okay with myself if i need to have a cry not scolding myself for this,allowing myself to miss a friend ..accepting that sometimes people just don't

get it and that life sometime just isn't fair and that its okay to be a bit pissed off oh and one thing i really wish is that if i have to practice the say in the pic then so should everyone else.....